The Living Stories of Michael Tongkeamha, Kiowa Nation Tribal Member

A Conversation with a Community Leader and Changemaker

Part 1

We are thrilled to announce the launch of Ideas! – a new platform designed to amplify the voices of people who bring a wealth of stories, professional experiences, and insights on a wide range of topics related to flourishing.

Topics cover crucial areas such as individual and planetary health, emotional resilience, ecological and environmental awareness, equity and social justice, kinship and belonging, and regenerative sustainability. Contributors also weave into these pieces personal experiences that offer vibrant stories and valuable lessons from their unique journeys.

In honor and celebration of the launch, we invited Michael Tongkeamha to share some of his wonderful stories and wisdom. Michael is a widely respected Kiowa community leader, business owner, and changemaker in North Texas, which is also the home of MBEI.

Michael joined Blake Hestir for a special collaborative interview. We are grateful that he made time for this project.

Michael Tonkeamha (left) and Blake Hestir (right) walking the land with Daniel Miranda at Oak Point Park and Nature Preserve. Photograph by Daniel Miranda.

Blake Hestir: Welcome, Michael! Thank you for taking time out of your busy schedule.

You are a revered storyteller. Perhaps you will share some of your own story. In our in-person programs at the Institute, we regularly open the circle with folks sharing about themselves, their families, who their parents and grandparents were, where they were raised, places that have a special resonance with them, and so forth. As a way of opening our conversation here, we would be honored if you would share some of your own powerful story.

Michael Tongkeamha: Hello. My name is Michael Tongkeamha. I am an enrolled tribal member of the Kiowa Nation. My mother and father moved to Dallas, Texas in the mid-sixties under what was called the Indian Relocation Act of 1956.

I was raised in an urban setting. There were mixed reviews about who I was or where I belonged, which I later found out is very common amongst Native Americans disconnected from their cultural identity. It's kind of like wondering which side you fit on. I have an interesting story about that for another time. 

On my mother's side, they are French descendants who helped to settle Creve Coeur, Missouri, in the 1860s. On my father's side, I am a descendant of Chief Stumbling Bear, I am of the Elk Creek and Saddle Mountain bands of Kiowa.  

My grandmother Peggy Tongkeamha-Nickel, my father’s mother, often visits me in my dreams. She will affirm or challenge spiritual decisions. She has always known how to cheer me up. She passed away when I was 18. She was an excellent bead worker. As a young girl, she served as a Kiowa / English interpreter at Fort Sill. Her tipi was just outside the original horse corral used by the cavalry when the fort was first established. Again, another story for another time.

No matter where I may have tried to fit into “modern society” or our Kiowa gatherings, my grandmother told me a long time ago, matter of factly, "You're either Kiowa or you're not." So I have always proudly identified Kiowa first and foremost.

Michael Tonkeamha at Standing Rock

Blake Hestir: These traditions of family and place are so essential in understanding who we are. Thank you for sharing. One time when we were talking and getting to know each other a little, you mentioned this momentous insight you had when you were younger. Would you like to share some about that transformative time?

Michael Tongkeamha: Yes, that was a turning point. I was a lost soul. A troubled teen with no purpose. There is a Kiowa creation story I personally relate to.

Blake Hestir: Please share!

Michael Tongkeamha: As a teen I went through that wandering phase, you know, no confidence and being easily influenced. From drug usage to crime. It first started where I was using steroids at the age of 14. It was definitely my gateway drug. I was a teen full of anger and rage. I look back on that part of my early life with some regret, and some gratitude. Primarily, I am grateful because I was able to lift myself away from drugs and crime at an early age. I’m not afraid to tell these things because over the years I have been instrumental with helping other teens battling the same in their lives. I can get on their level, and they know I’m not just lecturing. When my time on this walk ends, I want to be able to say I gave my best to those who needed me most.

Back to our Kiowa creation story. So somewhere around the age of 19, on a very hot summer day, while sitting on a bench reflecting on my purpose, surrounding my feet were these harmless red ants. It was like they came out of nowhere and my presence was their rendezvous spot. My first thought was to stomp them out. So I did. What seemed like a game of fun quickly turned into sadness. Here I was aggressively destroying these essential creatures. It wasn’t long afterwards that something calming came over me. I realized these ants were only being ants  – foraging and such. They weren’t attacking me on purpose, and so I stopped stomping them out with my feet. It was then I began reflecting and pondering my own existence. In many aspects, I, too, was like an ant in this hustling world we call life. 

At Oak Point Park and Nature Preserve. Photo by Daniel Miranda

Then, out of nowhere, I thought of our Kiowa Creation story. Saygee Saynday (the trickster/transformer culture hero of the Kiowa tribe) was coming along and stopped at a hollow cottonwood log on the ground. Deep down in a completely dark world, Saygee Saynday heard the Kiowa people talking from underneath the earth. After speaking with the Kiowa, Saygee Saynday instructed the Kiowa to come forward. Like ants they came out of an owl hole one by one. Thus, the existence of the Kiowa in this world began. It took that moment of clarity in my life, that quiet moment with those beautiful ants, to understand everything I thought was right, was actually wrong.

Blake Hestir: That shift in perspective was really a valuable insight, one of those ‘ah-ha’ moments.  

Michael Tongkeamha: I like to tell that story about the ants, because a lot of what we're talking about here, obviously in the Mind Body Ecology Institute, is spiritual health, mental health, physical health, and our relations with Mother Earth. And for me, that story is indicative of the lifestyle I want to live, in terms of how peaceful we can all be. If you stop looking at your life from just a small perspective and look at it from a universal perspective, as you look downwards from high above, you will see we humans walk about this world like ants. We're just a bunch of ants moving around. 

Blake Hestir: I hear you on that. Pausing to see the big picture is so important. I appreciate that you were in a green space, too. Like the ants, we are always going about being who we are, and deep down we care about family, friends, community, and where we live. Thank you for sharing that. 

This seems like a natural place to ask whether you would be open to sharing with the readers about your amazing company Sundance Home Remodeling here in North Texas. 

You're the founder of Sundance. I know you shared with me that you're passionate about working with high-quality, sustainable materials and innovative technologies like solar that support the earth and our communities. Some folks have a work life and then family life, but your work dovetails into all dimensions of your life and community relations. 

What is the mission of Sundance? How do you envision Sundance growing over the next 10 years?

Michael Tongkeamha: Well, the mission of Sundance Construction & Renewable Resources (formerly Sundance Home Remodeling) is to be a pillar for our community. We want to offer job opportunities and help our community at the same time. If there are community members in need, whether it be downed trees or other issues, we often help out where we are able to help out. It's really hard sometimes to charge people who are in dire situations, especially if you have an hour or two of free time to lend a hand.

The mission is to be known as the company for Native Americans and other communities, as someone who is out here doing things for our Native American people. Recently, my wife, BW, (we call her BW, which is short for Big Water, where she comes from in Monterrey Mexico and recognizes herself as Indigenous Mexican) came back from an all Native women solar training on the Pine Ridge reservation in South Dakota. The program was called B.R.I.D.G.E, which stands for Bridging Renewable Industry Divides in Gender Equality. Throughout this immersive program, participants delved into the deep intricacies of solar installation and solar energy, equipping themselves with the knowledge and skills needed to propel their careers within the dynamic solar industry. This helps add another level to our mission. Currently, Native American women only make up 0.05% of solar installers. Sundance and our partners at Redcloud Renewables are actively trying to bring a change to this statistic. In doing all of this, BW was able to help open up relationships between Sundance and Chief Henry Redcloud and his wife Mrs. Gloria Redcloud, who are the founders of Redcloud Renewables.

Now we want to take our business into something more sustainable as part of our 10-year plan. We are strategically planning to move into the government sector, which will open up more job opportunities for Native women and men. The key will be having the means to train and recruit qualified employees. Also part of our 10-year goal is to be solidified in the green build space.

Currently, some of the products we are certified to install are hemp wool products, asphalt shingles using recycled tires, fiberglass dome houses, to name a few. So we are actively searching ways we can be a “greener builder.” 

Blake Hestir: You are a proponent of solar, as you mentioned, and Sundance offers solar system installation and charging stations. As we’ve also discussed before, you see solar as an important step in taking better care of ourselves and the environment, but not as the final step since solar requires a lot of minerals, especially for the batteries, and are challenging to recycle.

Michael Tongkeamha:  Solar energy is, to me, a viable option and a step towards lessening fossil fuel and natural gas usage. This isn’t to say solar holds all the answers. One aspect of solar is battery storage, which involves lithium mining. The common environmental side effects of lithium mining are water loss, ground destabilization, biodiversity loss, increased salinity of rivers, contaminated soil and toxic waste. For me, it comes down to this: whatever you take from the earth, you have to be willing to give back to the earth. 

When I was telling you about the story of the Kiowa migrating from the Black Hills, they arrived in Southwest Oklahoma possibly late 16th century or maybe early 17th century. When the Kiowa arrived, they knew this was the land for them. Partly because of the surrounding lands, rivers, and game, but mostly because of a particular mountain and its fragrant cedar. It produces the sweetest smelling cedar fragrance. That mountain today is known as Longhorn Mountain. Although Longhorn Mountain sits on what Kiowa claims as our land, Longhorn Mountain is now owned by ranchers and mining companies. However, Kiowa from all over still go to harvest their cedar there. We also still defend it from destruction. Once a place for vision quests, now is just a place where other Kiowa, like myself, can sit and visit with these special Kiowa people that have journeyed beyond.

Whenever we go to Longhorn Mountain, our family will always leave an offering. Nothing is too small or too big to give away. Whatever may be in the heart at that particular moment, I suppose. There has even been a time or two when we forgot to leave our offering when harvesting for cedar, and something we had possession of, while there, went missing; the mountain takes even if we didn’t offer. I don’t get spooked by this. Simply said, this is a reminder, as mentioned above, whatever you take from this earth you have to be willing to give back.

So goes the challenge to better understand and how to handle both the recycling and mining of lithium.

Michael and family

Blake Hestir: There’s so much wisdom in what you share here, Michael. You know, so many people wouldn’t have thought of offering something in return. And yeah, although there was a time you forgot to leave an offering – I laugh thinking maybe the mountain is keeping it for you – but here you are living the insight through your act of offering, praying in respect and honor to the mountain for sharing something with you.  

Michael Tongkeamha: That was my message, my point to understand for myself: there are certain ways that we have to do things, certain ways we have to approach life. When you're removing resources from the earth, take them with a grateful heart, take them with an open mind and replenish them whenever possible. I think where we're losing, as a whole on this planet, is we're not removing resources with an open mind, and a grateful heart. 

When I think about our Sundance business, we do lead with that mindset of how we can bring a project alive with the least amount of materials possible without going through tons of waste.  

Michael and family

Blake Hestir:  I know you care deeply about your family and friends, and how widely-respected you are within the community. What you’ve shared so far also shows how much you care about supporting your customers, the company and employees, and your ancestral traditions – and Mother Earth.

Our work at the Mind Body Ecology Institute lies at the intersection of mental health, equity, and community with an emphasis on regenerative living. We help people reconnect with nature and community to promote personal and planetary flourishing while inspiring wise environmental stewardship.

What really concerns us is not just what is happening with the environment, but relatedly the chronic racism, the deepening inequity, and the further decline in mental health, especially among young adults. Yet we see this as a reflection of a crisis within ourselves, somehow thinking of ourselves as separate from, even privileged over Mother Earth.  

Michael, what would you share with someone who's lost connection with the land, with the prairies and mountains around them, with the cedar trees, the animals—someone who doesn't have an intimate relationship with the earth, someone who perhaps wasn't taught or raised that way, or unintentionally got off on an unhealthy path?

Michael Tongkeamha: Yeah, that's a really good question, because that really applies to all people of life. Unfortunately, in America, we have, I think, grown away from that with our desire for more. Think about the lands, think about Dallas, for example. At one time, it was known to Native Americans as the place where the prairies meet the forest. 

It would have required a certain type of people to live in those forests of long ago. The Caddo, Wichita, and some other tribes, in later dates, are an example of those that once lived in these wooded lands. Texas has its own uniqueness with tribal history. I won't go too much off on a tangent about that, but there used to be, at one time, a lot of tribes here in Texas, more than we can probably even imagine.

Presently, this isn't just a Native American land dilemma we're talking about – this is an American land dilemma, which is to say, we're all in this melting pot together. I'm in it with you, you're in it with me. And hopefully, at the end of the day, we don't want to see people come over here and take the land that we have remaining and destroy it. 

Blake Hestir: That’s phenomenal, Michael. Your stories carry important messages. It takes me back to the story of recognizing the perspective of the ants and understanding ways in which we're like ants. And again, pausing to step out into these broader perspectives and take in the complex relations that you keep returning to here is core part of your teaching. The Anglo-European “anthropocentric” worldview carries the assumption that the mind is in some sense separate from the body and the self is some  “thing” inherently separate from nature. We live in a very individualistic, self-centered, even self-privileged culture these days. 

You know, even the environmental movement, which has done some important work, still frames the conversation in terms of preserving “our” natural “resources,” as if Mother Earth were a resource for us to dig up and use as a receptacle for our waste.  

What you're sharing here is something much deeper, this idea of thinking beyond ourselves and thinking about the relations and impact we have on each other, other animals and the land. 

I'm wondering, if we had our children sitting here with us, like a community of children sitting around us, who are maybe 5 or 6 years old, I'm wondering what you would share with them about what to look forward to about their future. 

Something that we like to do at the Mind Body Ecology Institute is to focus on the positive and constructive, what is going to support the younger generations – what people have to look forward to if we do the work, if we band together to do this work wisely and compassionately. What might share with these kids?

Michael Tongkeamha: I really like what you mentioned about sharing the positivity side of it. To me, that is the most important thing. I have always lived my life with the glass half full. With that being said, my family has our ups and downs. These are the growing pains of life. But we do the best with what we have. We pray for those in need, because there are many with greater concerns than our own. The creator provides for all. Sometimes it’s our turn for favor, sometimes we have to be patient and steadfast in our faith. These are good lessons for the youth. At some point, we have to slow their minds to help them gain better clarity for life’s choices that await them. It starts at home and goes from there.

Blake Hestir: That seems like a big part of recognizing that we do have the power to act and the value of taking responsibility for those actions, and given that we’re all related, we have a responsibility for supporting – a big lesson for folks. 

Michael Tongkeamha: Matter of fact, I'm about to start my first year as a teacher at the School of Yes here in Dallas. I'm really looking forward to getting in there and delivering a positive message. There's still a lot of hope and love left in this world. I think if we just look deep enough, if we're still willing to embrace the positive more than the negative, yeah, we're going to be just fine.

Blake Hestir: The power of love, Michael! Right on! Thank you so much for taking time today to share in conversation. I know I can speak for all of us in saying how grateful we are for you, your family, and all the hard work and care you bring to our communities. I’ll look forward to our next conversation in this special series! 

Kiowa Logo Emblem

The above logo featured above is the official logo of the Kiowa Tribe and was created by Roland Whitehorse. The logo features a Kiowa Warrior of the Plains. The symbolism includes ten eagle feathers which represent the ten Kiowa Medicine Bundles deriving power from the Half Boy, “Tahlee.” The lightning bolt on the front left leg of the horse suggests the voice of thunder heard each Spring and is represented on the Great Drum of the Oh-ho-mah Society as being held in the eagle talons. The bone breast plate and red cape (Spanish Officer coat), the circular blue sky of the Great Plains and the blood red band print are part of the Koitsenko Warrior tradition. The shield depicts the sacred Rainy Mountain in Oklahoma, the sacred Kiowa burial ground at the end of the Great Tribal Journey. The recurring circular patterns represent either the Sun or the Moon, both important in the Kiowa ceremonial dance rituals of the Skaw-Tow (Sundance), the Feather (Ghost) Dance and the Peyote (Native American Church) Service.

Source: https://www.kiowatribe.org/about-us